Never let Teddy babysit!
by Harrypotterlover56
Summary: Harry, Ginny, Hermione, and Ron all go out to celebrate their pregnancies leaving Teddy to babysit a two year old James. When they come back James just happens to sing a song for them. The song of course he worte himself.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own anything. The ages of Teddy and James may not be correct but I just made up how old they are. Teddy is 10 and James is 2.**

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Harry, Ginny, Hermione, and Ron came into the Potter's house. They all just came back from going out to dinner to celebrate Ginny and Hermione pregnancies. Teddy was babysitting James for them. As Harry shut the door a ten year old Teddy ran into the room. Harry got out his wallet and started getting the money to pay Teddy with.

"Thank you Harry." Teddy said.

At that moment the Floo in the fireplace turned green as Draco Malfoy walked in. Ron glared at Draco. Harry and Draco may be in speaking turns but Ron still did not have to like him.

"Hey Teddy your grandma wanted me to pick you up. She was busy doing something. Anyway I have to take you home." Draco said. "We have to hurry. Astoria is getting all hormonal and fat."

"Okay." Teddy said. Draco and Teddy were about to leave when a two year old James came in the room.

"Wait!" James said. "Teddy and I wrote a song."

"I did not write a song. What are you talking about?" Teddy said the same time Harry said.

"Okay can we hear the song?"

"Yep! It goes like this." James took in a deep breath and started singing. "Ron Weasley is a bitch, bitch, bitch, a gay bitch, bitch, bitch."

As James sang that line over and over Draco started laughing and got his Muggle phone that Astoria forced him to get and started taking a video of it.

"Ron Weasley is a bitch, bitch, bitch, a freaking gay bitch, bitch, bitch. Ron Weasley is a bastard who won't let me help name his child. Ron Weasley is a gay bitch, bitch, bitch! Ron Weasley is a bitch and is gay!" James finished singing.

"Oh I guess I did help you write that song. Lets get out of here Draco!" Teddy yelled and ran to the fire place.

"Oh no you don't Teddy!" Harry yelled as he ran after Teddy. "As amusing as his song was I would like to know why my two year old son was singing that song with those words."

"I thought the song was brilliant. I am starting to like your son Potter." Draco said putting his phone away.

Ron was staring at James in horror.

"Teddy explain now." Harry said fighting the grin off his face.

"It started…"

**FLASH BACK: **

_Harry and Ginny just left with Hermione and Ron celebration dinner._

"_Why couldn't they take me on their stupid dinner? They should be lucky to be able to spend time with me. But no I get stuck babysitting James." Teddy said out loud as he started water for Mac and Cheese._

_Teddy went to set the table and notice Ron left a letter on the table addressed to him. Teddy opened it._

_**Dear Teddy,**_

_**I would like to tell you this in person but I am busy with Hermione and you know she is pregnant. Anyway we appreciate the fact that you want to help us name our first child but I am going to have to decline the names you mailed us. First off I would never name my son Scorpius. I do not give a damn if it is your favorite star constellation. It is a name Malfoy would use. Second the name Bellatrix wasn't even funny. I do not care if you got that name from one of your Muggle friends. There is no way in hell I would name my child Bellatrix. It is even hard for me to write her name. Third I am not naming my child Elvis. I do not care if you like the singer Elvis Presley. Your list goes on and on. The only name I actually liked was Rose but there is still no way in hell I would name my child after a plant. That is a Malfoy and Black tradition. Thanks for the name list but you just helped Hermione and I what 106 boy and girl names not to pick. **_

_**Ron Weasley.**_

"_How dare that stupid gay weasel bitch! I tell Ron Weasley the asshole all these perfectly good names and he tells me that they are all stupid! How can Ron Weasley freaking do this to me? I gave him awesome names! I mean who wouldn't want a child name Scorpius? Whoever names their child that I hope he marries Ron's child." Teddy said not noticing James come in the room hearing everything Teddy said and leaving with an evil grin on his face._

**FLASHBACK OVER:**

"…and after that we ate dinner and I watch TV with James until you guys came home." Teddy finished. Ron's face was red and he was glaring at Teddy.

"Rose…" Hermione said. "I like that name. If we are having a girl we are going to name her Rose."

Ron just stared at her. "I thought we agreed we would name her Lavender."

"I would never name my child after that slut." Hermione said.

"I also happen to like the name Scorpius. Come on Teddy lets go home and show your grandma and Astoria the song James sang." Draco said.

"Can we leave out the part that it was my fault he was singing it?"

"Yep."

"Sweet lets go."

Teddy and Draco left the house before anyone could do or say anything.

"Did Teddy really just leave without getting punished for telling your son to sing horrid things about me?" Ron asked.

"Yes. Oh well lets go watch TV." Harry said as James started singing his song again.


	2. Teddy's Letter To Ron

**So i was bored and i was rereading my Teddy babysitting story and decided to write Teddy's letter to Ron. I hope it amuses you.**

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Dear Ron,

I have decided to help you and Hermione on your quest to choose a name for your child. I know that this decision will be hard for you. First you have to choose a name that will not embarrass the child when it gets older. Or worse make the child hate you for life. Incase you are wondering I would not name the child Sirius. The child will probably hate you. I know you and Hermione might have wanted to choose the name yourselves so I have made a list. I have thought up of 106 awesome names for you to use. I hope that this list will help you narrow down the names you want to pick.

1. Alexander

2. Mary

3. Max

4. Maximum (Incase the baby is a girl.)

5. John

6. Bellatrix

7. Harry

8. Tina

9. Matthew

10. Mary

12. Robert

13. Sara

14. Dane

15. Betty

16. Joey

17. Bridgett

18. Mark

19. Mandy

20. Ron Jr.

21. Amanda

22. Freddie

23. Marisa

24. Jacob

25. Isabella

26. Louis

27. Rachael (or Rachel depending how you would want to spell it.)

28. Aston

29. Ashley

30. Ryan

31. Cynthia

32. Scorpius (This is my personal favorite for a guy. It is my favorite star constellation.)

33. Sadie

34. Carton

35. Bertha

36. Percy

37. Katie

38. Grover

39. Sissy

40. Odd

41. Julia

42. Elvis (One of my favorite singers.)

43. Stephanie

44. Stephen (Or Steven depending how you would want to spell it.)

45. Madeline

46. Edgar

47. Polly

48. Justin

49. Molly

50. Peter

51. Rain

52. Simon

53. Wednesday

54. Andrew

55. Tuesday

56. Noah

57. Jocelyn

58. Fernando

59. Diane

60. Donny

61. Elizabeth

62. Jonny

63. Beth

64. Jonathan

65. Eliza

66. Darwin

67. Lindsey

68. Danny

69. Joe

70. Ruby

71. Marcus

72. Grace

73. Brett

74. Holly

75. Nathan

76. Jude

77. Nate

78. Lesley

79. Chris

80. Judy

81. Toby

82. Janis

83. Rudy

84. Roy

85. Roxanne

86. Jane

87. Tarzan

88. Marilyn

89. Teddy (After me!)

90. Chloe

91. Sebastian

92. Kari

93. Richie

94. Clare

95. Eddy

96. Harriet

97. Eric

98. Annie

99. Frank

100. Jamie

102. Brandon

103. Stella

104. Sky

105. Jenna

106. Rose (My favorite for a girl.)

So here is my list of names. I hope you pick one of my favorites. Until next time,

Teddy


End file.
